//  MARRIAGE \\

Proverbs 5:15 Drink water from your own cistern, and running water from your own well. (NKJ)

Proverbs  5:18 Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice with the wife of your youth. (NKJ)

Prov 12:4 An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones. (NKJ)

Prov 18:22  He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the LORD. (NKJ)

Prov 19:13b the contentions of a wife are a continual dripping. (NKJ)

Webster contention = strife

Prov 19:14b a prudent wife is from the LORD. (NKJ)

Prov 21:19 Better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and angry woman. (NKJ)

Eccl 9:9 Live joyfully with the wife whom you love all the days of your vain life which He has given you under the sun, all your days of vanity; for that is your portion in life, and in the labor which you perform under the sun. (NKJ)

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Hebrews 13:4  Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge. (NKJ)

Proverbs 6:32 Whoever commits adultery with a woman lacks understanding; he who does so destroys his own soul.  (NKJ)

2 Corinthians 6:14  Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? (NKJ)

1Cor 2:16  "For the LORD God of Israel says that He hates divorce, for it covers one's garment with violence," says the LORD of hosts. "Therefore take heed to your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously." (NKJ)

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Here are some insights pertaining to how seriously God views the covenant of marriage.   This is what God had to say to the Israelites in Malachi's day.

First what were they doing?  Husbands were sending away their wives in violation of the covenant that God witnessed between them and he is displeased. They were divorcing their Israelite wives and intermarrying with women serving pagan deities in violation of the covenant of the fathers (Deut. 7:1-4) producing offspring with diluted religious beliefs.  God hates divorce.

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Malachi 2:10-16
10 Have we not all one Father? Has not one God created us? Why do we deal treacherously with one another by profaning the covenant of the fathers?
11 Judah has dealt treacherously, and an abomination has been committed in Israel and in Jerusalem, for Judah has profaned the LORD'S holy institution which He loves: he has married the daughter of a foreign god.
12 May the LORD cut off from the tents of Jacob the man who does this, being awake and aware, yet who brings an offering to the LORD of hosts!
13 And this is the second thing you do: you cover the altar of the LORD with tears, with weeping and crying; so He does not regard the offering anymore, nor receive it with goodwill from your hands.
14 Yet you say, "For what reason?" Because the LORD has been witness between you and the wife of your youth, with whom you have dealt treacherously; yet she is your companion and your wife by covenant.
15 But did He not make them one, having a remnant of the Spirit? And why one? He seeks godly offspring. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth.
16 "For the LORD God of Israel says that He hates divorce, for it covers one's garment with violence," says the LORD of hosts. "Therefore take heed to your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously." (NKJ)

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Larry Christenson offers comments about the verses in Malachi Chapter 2:13, 14, 16.

God backs up the Covenant of Marriage.  Family order.  When two people marry, God stands as a witness to the marriage, sealing it with the strongest possible word: covenant.  Covenant speaks of faithfulness and enduring commitment.  It stands like a divine sentinel over marriage, for blessing or for judgment.  Divorce is here described as violence to God's intention for marriage and to the mate to whom one has been joined.  Yet, where husband and wife live according to their marriage vows, all the power of a covenant-keeping God stands behind them and their marriage.  What a confidence, to know that God backs up our marriage.  His power and authority stand against every enemy that would violently threaten it from without or within.  

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The bible has some things to say to those married husband and wives.

Marriage Christ and the Church  

Ephesians 5:22-33   22  Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.

23  For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body.

24  Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.

25   Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her,

26   that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word,

27   that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.

28   So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself.

29   For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church.

30   For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones.

31   "For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh."

32   This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church.

33   Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.  (NKJ)

Larry Christenson comments about Ephesians 5:22-33:  Christ and the church model husband/wife relationships family order.  The specific instructions that the apostle Paul gives to husbands and wives are a glimpse of the bridegroom and bride a heavenly model for every marriage on Earth.  As a husband, how should I behave toward my wife?  Look to Christ, the divine bridegroom, in his relationship with the church; love her, sacrifice for her, listen to her concerns, take care of her; be as sensitive to her needs and her hurts as you are to those of your own body. 

As a wife, how should I behave toward my husband?  Look to the chosen bride, the church, in its relationship with Christ; respect him, acknowledge his calling as head of the family, respond to his leadership, listen to him. praise him, be unified in purpose and will with him; be a true helper, (see Gen. 2:18)

No husband and wife can do this by mere willpower or resolve, but since you (including your marriage are "His workmanship" Eph 2:8-10; God will help bring this about.  (1Cor. 11:3/1 Peter 3:1-7)

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1 Peter 3:1-8   Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives,

2  when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear.

3  Do not let your adornment be merely outward-- arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel--

4  rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.

5  For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands,

6  as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, whose daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any terror.

7  Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.

8  Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous; (NKJ)

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The Christian Home   ``````````````````

Colossians Chapter 3:

18 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. NKJ)

19 Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them. (NKJ)

20 Children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord. (NKJ)

21 Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged. (NKJ)

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Principles of Marriage (NKJ)      ````````````````````

1 Corinthians 7:1  Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman.

2  Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.

3  Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.

4  The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.

5  Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.  (KJV)

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The living bible puts it this way

1 Corinthians 7:1 {Instruction on Marriage--} Now about the questions you asked in your letter. Yes, it is good to live a celibate life.

2  But because there is so much sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband.

3  The husband should not deprive his wife of sexual intimacy, which is her right as a married woman, nor should the wife deprive her husband.

4  The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband also gives authority over his body to his wife.

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SEX OUTSIDE OF MARRIAGE NO!

1 Corinthians 6:15  Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a harlot? Certainly not! (NKJ)

20 For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God's. (NKJ)

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REMEMBER FORBIDDEN FRUIT MAY BE SWEETER BUT IT ROTS SOONER. -- REXELLA VAN IMPE

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1 Corinthians 7:8 But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am; (NKJ)

9 but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion. (NKJ)

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STAND FOR A BROKEN MARRIAGE

Col 1:20  and by Him to[[ reconcile all things ]] to Himself, by Him, whether things on earth or things in heaven, having made peace through the blood of His cross. (NKJ)

DOES THIS MEAN YOUR MARRIAGE ALSO?? he reconciles all things on earth or things in heaven

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THE VIRTUOUS WIFE READ: PROVERBS 31:10-31

Prov 31:10 Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies.(NKJ)

Attributes: verses 11 trusts, 12 does good, 13 good, 15 provides, 16 buys, 17 strong, 18 has perception, 20 extends hand to poor, 21 household is clothed, 25 strength and honor, 26 wisdom tongue of kindness, 28 children call her blessed, praised, 31 works praise her. 

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"That the woman was made of a rib out of the side of Adam; not out of his feet to be trampled on by him, but out of his side to be equal with him, under his arm to be protected, and near his heart to be loved."      Matthew Henry

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::  ::  ::  ::  ::  ::   1-3-17   The New York Post    Page  21    ::  ::  ::  ::  ::  ::

Couples Therapy for America

Fixing the red-blue uncivil war

By Megan McArdle

Shortly before I got married, I received a piece of sterling advice that I have been mulling a lot over the last year: “You have a big decision to make: Do you want to be married, or do you want to be right?”  Even a good marriage offers a lot of opportunities for grievance.  The more determined you are to win every battle, the more likely you are to lose what is important: the person that you love so much that you have chosen to spend the rest of your life with them.  And so every time you have a real disagreement – the kind that cannot be finessed by agreeing that tonight you’ll order Indian, and the next time you’ll get Chinese – you have to think carefully before you decide to have that fight.  Is this really the hill that you’re willing to let your marriage die on?  Because if not, now’s a good time to shrug your shoulders and let them paint the ceiling teal.  How often do you really look up there, anyway?  You have to decide this even when the grievances are more important than paint colors:  Your partner snaps at you when they’ve had a bad day, leaves their junk lying around for you to pick up, spends too much money on things you don’t need, or vanishes whenever your family comes over.  Some hills are worth dying on.  But a lot of them are of no strategic value in gaining your ultimate objective: a long and happy partnership. If you spend your marriage trying to ensure that everything is always rigorously fair and just, and grabbing the flaming sword of righteousness every time some minor wrong is done to you, you may soon find that you spend more time fighting than you would have picking up their towels or going into the other room to watch a movie because your spouse is in a bad mood.  Or you may find that you have a peaceful, clean house that’s exactly as you want it – because you’re living there alone.  A reassuring, note to my alarmed readers: I haven’t been thinking about this because my marriage is on the rocks.  Like everyone else, my husband and I had to get adjusted to the fact of another person around whose needs must be considered on par with your own.  But we’re doing just fine this year.  It’s another marriage I’ve been watching disintegrate; the one between red and blue states.  While traveling a few months back, I ended up chatting with a divorce attorney, who observed that what we're seeing in America right now bears a startling resemblance to what he sees happen with many of his clients.  They've lost sight of what they ever liked about each other; in fact, they've even lost sight of their own self-interest.  All they can see is their grievances, from annoying habits to serious wrongs.  The other party, of course, generally has their own set of grievances.  There is a sort of geometric progression of outrage, where whatever you do to the either side is justified by whatever they did last.  They, of course, offer similar justifications for their own behavior. By the time the parties get to this state, the object is not even necessarily to come out of the divorce with the most money and stuff; it's to ensure that your former spouse comes out with as little as possible.  People will fight viciously to get a knick-knack neither of them particularly likes, force asset sales at a bad loss and otherwise behave as if the victor is not the person who goes on to live a productive and happy life, but the one who makes it impossible for the ex to do so.  However damaging these battles are at least they eventually end. etc.. etc..  

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